When doves try (Explicit!)

Orford breakfast,

Al fresco don’t you know!

Calm before the onslaught of work

Is wrecked!

Bleedin’ collared doves battle to see who has the shittiest call

Ooohooohoo, oooohhoooooohoooo, ohooohoo



Man you are all so fucking lame,

with your early morning dick waving and

Your head bobbing waddle across the grass and

‘Cos ‘Your Bird’ is forced to leave each egg perched teetering

On some spare, flat twig – ‘cos you’re way too shit at DIY nests.

Because you are so well named – Mr. Collared Cock

Ooooohhoooooohoooo, oooohhoooooohoooo, oooohhoooooohoooo

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